“I love him but he does not love me.”
“I love him but he loves somebody else.”
“I love him but he doesn’t know it”.
I love him but am afraid it might ruin our friendship.”
These are some of what my friends usually say to me when they ask for
some advice. I am neither a “love genius” nor someone who had a degree
on Bachelor of Arts in Love and Relationships. I probably can say
that am an observer of life and love and I’ve learned a lot thru that.
(though this wouldn’t give a license for me to advice, but anyway, we r
on a democratic country…everyone is free to write whats on his mind as
long as he knows his limitation)
Back to my topic…
Just like any other girl, fairytales and movies end with “…and they
live happily ever after” make me believe that love exists to stand and
stay- and because of that idea, I have started to dream and create my
own love story for so long. They differ depending on what situations or
emotions are driving me in- and believe me, those stories could
probably win an Oscar award if given a chance to be seen on the big
screen.
A man wearing his best suit ever while looking directly on my eyes
saying how much he loves me, a romantic place where there are only two
people- me and my man (and of course, our dear moon, shining his light
towards us) and a nice dinner date with endless love songs playing.
These are some of the content of my dreams and it feels good when you
imagine yourself with someone, somewhere in those dreams, but it strikes
your heart hard when you open your eyes, and finally realize that
everything is just a “smoke” destined to vanished as soon as the air
whispers.
What am I saying? well in the real world, you could not simply say “I
love you”. There is always a “but” which makes it complicated. The “but”
becomes a big hindrance why people can’t simply express their
feelings.
Throughout the history of lovekind, we were given the idea that love is
something which is out of this world. It has been a subject of endless
poems and other literatures. Both give us an idea of what love is, but
it doesn’t end there because we usually question the validity ff such
definition.
William Shakespeare believes in love but most of his stories often
involves conflict which is the “but” in love. Romeo and Juliet love each
other but society demands the opposite. Paris loves Juliet but she
loves Romeo. Romeo at first loves Rosaline but she is unreachable. These
are just some of the “but” which Shakespear believes in when it comes
to love.
So, the bottom line here is that, why love needs to be complicated?
Can’t people just love and be happy? Why instead of saying, “I love
you”, we usually say, “I love you but…”?
Why is it like that? Perhaps, even Doctor love couldn’t answer that.
As for me, love becomes complicated because we make it that way. We
decide how to react on certain things which evolves on love. We are the
one who chooses what feeling to share or not to share.
It’s nice to be in love, but watch out to the “buts” that surrounds
this word. When love becomes painful, its time to let go but for some
people, its the time to hold even tighter. Its your choice anyway:-)
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| Photo Credit: Google |
New Yorker in Tondo is a story about a Filipino named Kikay who used to live in a slum area in Tondo Manila and had a chance to live in New York. After several years of living a sophisticated life in New York, she visited Tondo again and she no longer knew how to converse using the Filipino language because of the so-called “a culturization”.
Another character that I enjoyed was of Aling Atang, mother of Kikay, who has been carried away by her daughter’s way of living. She tries to converse with everybody in broken English.
*Here are some of the scenes I enjoyed in this play;
Tony: Aling Atang, andyan ba si Kikay? (Aling Atang, is Kikay in?)
Aling Atang: You should not call me “Aling Atang”
Tony: Bakit hindi? (Why not?)
Aling Atang: My daughter says that it's more civilized to call me Mrs. Mendoza.
Tony: Ah sige aling… ay Mrs. Mendoza..(Ah ok aling…oh, Mrs. Mendoza)
Aling Atang :Wait a moment and I will call Franceska.
Aling Atang: Oh! And Tony..You ought not to call her Kikay.
Tony: Ano naman ang itatawag ko sa kanya? (And what shall I call her?)
Aling Atang: You ought to call her Francesca..
Tony: Francisca?
Aling Atang: Not Francisca.. Fran-CES-ca..
Tony: Pero bakit Francesca? (But why Francesca?)
Aling Atang: Because in New York , she says that’s the way they pronounce her name, it sounds like “chi-chi” so Italian, be sure to call her Francesca and not Kikay.
*Kikay and Aling Atang (Note that Aling Atang tries to speak in broken English, I just couldn’t write it here for the sake of everyone)
Kikay: Oh hello darling people!! Nena my dear!.. and Tony, my little buddy, how are you? And Totoy… my raishing! You look goodness, you look like a Tondo Super Production in Technicolor!! But sit-down everybody and let me look at you, oh mumsy!
Aling Atang: What’s the problem now?
Kikay: How many times I must tell you, never to serve fruit juices in water glasses?
Aling Atang: I couldn’t find those tall glasses you brought home.
Kikay: Oh, poor li’l mumsy. She is so clumsy, but never mind, don’t break your heart about it. Here sit down.
Aling Atang: I must be going to the market.
Kikay: Oh, don’t forget my celery. I can’t live without it. I’ like a rabbit, munch all day.
Aling Atang: Well, if you people will excuse me. Tony, remember me to your mother.
Kikay: And remember, a little bloom on the lips, a little bloom on the cheeks and say mwah, mwah!
Although it was presented in a funny way, I must say that the cultural theme of this play touched the audience. It portrays the actuality how most people likely forget their real identity once they move overseas. And this is true amongst some Filipinos abroad although we can't really blamed those folks who altered their ways because they have to incorporate themselves in the new environment that they are in. They were put in those circumstances, and they have to deal with it since in the long run, they moved to get a better life. Though, it would be much better if we build up ourselves, yet we should keep our real identity.
Let’s be proud of our nation for the reason that whichever way we look next to it, we will constantly be a Filipino.
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| Photo Credit to Google |
"Just My Luck" is the story of Ashley Albright, a bright girl and known to be as the luckiest girl in Manhattan, where everything goes with her. But little does she know, her good fortunate is about to change in just one kiss. Jake Hardin who dreams of success as a band manager, is her exact opposite. He is a guy plagued with injustice wherein he sometimes being placed in compromising or injurious positions. When the two strangers meet and kiss at a masquerade ball, Ashley suddenly finds herself the unluckiest woman in the world while Jake having all the luck he needs. They switch paths with just a simple kiss. Ashley desperately tried to find Jake and reverse her misfortune. Ashley discovers that her terrible twist-of-fate is the luckiest thing that ever happened to her as the two fall in love with each other.
The movie, backed up with great performances is a romantic, funny and has a unique story. It's light-hearted and not to forget the performance of McFly who is currently a successful British band in reality.
"Just My Luck" shows the reality happening to some people who are experiencing good luck and bad luck. Ashley portrays those people who depends only with what they call "luck". Whatever good happens to them, they automatically say, "It's my luck!". On the other hand, when bad things happen, they usually blame their lost of their luck, and eventually lead them in frustration and the feeling of being a loser. While there are some people, portrays by Jake, who after experiencing "bad luck", turns "good luck", is still able to relate with people who don't have it so well.
The movie is is not just an ordinary teen-age movie, but it also teaches the viewer that life is not perfect. There can be good and bad times, and people must learn how to handle what life offer them. In the end, we all find learning from them.
The "Joy Luck Club" is one of the
interesting movies I have ever seen. This was an adaptation of Amy Tan's
novel about the four Chinese women bound together by hope.
Wayne
Wang's directorial style is truly a remarkable and commendable. He uses
flashbacks to connect 16 different stories. The movie might be more
focused on the feminine side of life since the movie does not have a
major male actor. However, despite of this one-sided view, I must admit,
I was captured by the movie's emotional pull. Every line speaks
directly to my heart.
Amy Tan did a good job writing this novel, and Wayne Wang for putting this in the big picture. The story focuses on four Chinese immigrants families in San Francisco who started the club known as "The Joy Luck Club".
For a non-movie fanatic, the story may be a bit confusing because it's a story within a story which some people can hardy follow.
Many times in my life, I was dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions I made and the circumstances around. When I hit a wall of failure, it was often resulted in feelings of worthlessness.
Those were the moments wherein, I just found myself sitting back and pitying myself. I based my life’s worth then on what I can do and what I own.
But attending a Christian fellowship for some years taught me to trust on what God says about me. Not on what I knew and not what I saw or heard from the world. It took me through a time of rediscovery, affirming myself clearly that I was on the right track and that my worth was still derived from the truth that I am created in His image.
These truths helped me securely understand that I have a great worth. My worth is given by God and can’t be taken away by failures.
Last weekend I
went to my home church in Pampanga, which for me is one of the happiest
places on earth. I sing with people who have the same faith as I do,
while jumping because of the joy brought by the praise songs. While I
was there I considered making the following resolutions: to be happy, to
relax and to see old friends. I was able to fulfill the last two
resolutions. However, to be happy, on its real sense seems far from me.
People
want happiness. It might be a cliche already but being happy has been
the ultimate goal of everyone- it is the ultimate goal of my life.
I have been taught by my Pastor that happiness does not depend on whom you are with or what you have with- it’s a matter of choice. You are happy because you choose to be happy, and you are sad because you choose to be sad. Quite simple, but definitely hard to do.
Like in my situation, wherein I am torn between two paths. Both would lead me to happiness, but the question on which one would lead to a greater happiness remains a quest for me.
These thoughts were triggered more by a song I heard on a radio with the lyrics, “Do you know, where you are going to? Do you like the things that life is showing you? Where are you going to? Do you know?…”
I
have been thinking about the same questions for sometimes. Then I
finally realize that I am still confused on which path should I walk
into.
I decided to study Mass Communication to fulfill a vision. That vision is to work as an Advocate of a Christian organization who is fighting for women’s rights. A big company in Europe supported me on this journey. Right then, I said to myself that I am ready to play my role in that organization. But things do not happen the same way as we see it. The Christian organization was closed last year. At first, I am sad because that would mean, I do not have a “sure” job, as what I call it. But this journey should continue. I choose to see myself in another way- in a more broad area where I can see myself competing with other people looking for a job and exploring the world of media. Somehow, it gives excitement to me. I have fear, but the faith is more evident.
I am ready to step my feet on that uncertainty until the company who is supporting me offers me the same work as what I supposed to be working in that Christian organization. I am happy but I do not understand why I can not find that intense feeling inside of me.
The two choices leave me with confusion. Should I take the risk and do what I want, although I am not sure of what awaits to me? Or should I accept the job which my scholarship offers to me? Would it be ungrateful if I say no to them? But how about my freedom to choose?
Those
were only some of the questions on my mind. But whatever choice I made,
I know that at the end of the day…It would still lead me to happiness.
Greater or lesser happiness?- that I still do not know
;;
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